seriously?! sara

butterfly

2011-09-29T21:47:00.001-05:00

rainy day

2011-09-29T21:46:00.001-05:00

It rained in Dallas yesterday, and Leighton said to me as we walked outside, "Uh oh, momma! The sky spilled. It's raining!"

Simple truths. Precious child.

2011-08-24T23:15:00.001-05:00

leighton had her first big girl swim lesson (as in, mommy no longer in the water) today - and she was a rockstar. i was so proud of my little fish!

us: "what's your name?"
lei: "nemo." or, sometimes "sharkbait."

maybe she's right!

2011-08-21T21:30:00.001-05:00

old friends

2011-08-21T12:53:00.001-05:00

we spent last night with old friends. while russ and i got to celebrate jessica paup's wedding and relive some good 'ol eagle tennis days, our dear friends stephanie and andrew kept leighton.

this is a picture of beau and me. ok, not really, but it could be. it's actually leighton and henry, and
this picture makes my heart smile.

old friends are the best friends. we are so grateful for relationships which have stood
the test of time and enriched our lives to the fullest.

2011-08-09T23:36:00.001-05:00

sweet dreams, my darling.

weekend to-do's

2011-08-07T14:55:00.001-05:00

washing the dog

swaddling the twins

lazy saturday

2011-07-16T13:33:00.001-05:00

how could any day spent together, wearing pigtails, dining on powdered donuts and chocolate milk, spotting airplanes and trying to ride a tricycle not be perfect?

love these lazy days

shirley temple

2011-07-15T21:41:00.001-05:00

leighton's introduction to the sweet, sweet world of shirley temples. reminds me so much of my own childhood, out to eat with my grandma and grandpa. hope she always has the same fond memories of being a little girl!

2011-07-13T21:07:00.001-05:00

date night aqui

the blues

2011-07-10T11:05:00.001-05:00

we made a quick weekend trip to pensacola to see the blue angels (russ' absolute favorite), and
this year we tried it from the water.

the deck hand got tired

"where'd the airplanes go?"

my angel

2011-07-08T12:34:00.001-05:00

pieces of home

2011-06-25T06:54:00.001-05:00

my favorite girlfriend snuck little pieces of home into my bag while i was working nights this month. funny how some abc's and a baby zebra made me smile and momentarily forget the drama and trauma of the ER!

just walked in after finishing month 5 of 8, and i'm thrilled to actually BE HOME! headed to find my snuggle buddies!

Uugghh

2011-06-06T23:04:00.001-05:00

Working nights is NOT my favorite. Wasn't there sand between my toes just yesterday?

waco

2011-05-28T14:17:00.001-05:00

we've spent the day riding horses and enjoying some country air...

our 1st house

18 months

2011-05-26T22:41:00.001-05:00

She started small, but Leighton is living up to her genetic potential. At her 18 month visit...90% weight, 93% height and an off-the-chart big head! I took the day off an we went from the dr to the dentist to the aquarium. It was so nice (despite the shots and the associated tears) to have a day with my baby!

funfetti

2011-05-24T11:32:00.001-05:00

leighton and i made funfetti cupcakes (deemed yum-yums by the little girl) yesterday for a sweet friend who happens to love them.

you should inspect each sprinkle for quality control.

even grace got in on the fun...who could resist those eyes?

entertaining herself with a glove balloon at the hospital :)

a late night dinner after all our yum-yums.

what a funfetti evening :)

sunday, sunday

2011-05-22T23:10:00.001-05:00

Why are these beautiful (albeit muggy and humid) weekends so short? Boo. Pictures of our day of rest...

Lunch with the Housers!

Hipstamatic is making Russ look particularly tan.

A true contractor's daughter; Leighton LOVES the dirt. She even sneaks handfuls out of the playground and will then deposit them down your shirt, in the backseat, etc. C'mon, save the earth. Leave it at the park, little love.

urban saturday

2011-05-21T21:04:00.001-05:00

we played at a super chic "lilly pad" park downtown. leighton loved the water and the little spinner cup. such a little daredevil. how we've loved just having a day as a family!

...little wet footprints...

LOVE these two. bunches.

love these girls

2011-05-21T15:26:00.001-05:00

my love

2011-05-20T22:41:00.001-05:00

a day in the life

2011-05-19T23:15:00.001-05:00

Location:dallas arboretum

cousins

2011-05-18T23:43:00.001-05:00

...with puppies and bunnies and a pony...

say cheese!

happy 18 month birthday, little girl!

2011-05-17T23:35:00.000-05:00

2011-05-17T22:00:00.000-05:00

seriously sara? how did i not know that i could text posts straight to my blog. this is fantastic news...

hawaii - oahu

2011-04-03T23:23:00.002-05:00

leighton and i got to spend a sunny week in hawaii not too long ago. russ couldn't go at the last minute because of work but one of our dearest, jenna, was up for the challenge. we started in honolulu because i had to present at a spine imaging conference. we survived a 3.2 earthquake while we there - ok, we didn't even feel it; and, in the wake of what those grouchy tectonic plates have done since then, it's not quite as laughable as it was at the time. we ate puka dogs and hiked to waterfalls (where creepy european posers were partially obstructing the view, see below). then, we flew to maui. i lost my drivers license somewhere along the way - and some swet somebody has since mailed it back to me. we stopped and saved a gigantic islander who got hit by a car on his moped, and the firemen let me wash my hands in the firetruck water. (that's about as close to hawaii five-o action as it came). we lounged. we ordered room service. we ate jph which was imported from the continental 48. we laughed. we smelled tropical flowers and said bye-bye to all the lizards. we {lei} would NOT wear a lei - no way, no how. we went whale watching. i took way too much stuff, and jenna had to deal with the cluster that was my disorganization and clutter. next time, i'm taking bathing suits and the ipad...that's it. ps - jenna, you're the best. xo

maui pics to come :)

one year later...

2011-03-26T17:56:00.000-05:00

leighton's 1 year pictures

love this little girl

i am thankful to have this sweet little family. we dressed like it was winter and dallas randomly turned out to be 85. leighton took a while to wake up from her nap. i was running a fever and felt like donkey. nevertheless, i am so thankful to have the memories caught in pictures....again thanks to jennifer smith, http://www.unearthedphotography.com/.

tonight my heart is thankful

2011-03-21T00:04:00.000-05:00

that's it, in a nutshell

tonight my heart is thankful

for a dear, sweet little family and time spent together

for the precious little girl beside me with her arm on her daddy's shoulder

for her daddy's strength and loyalty and perseverance

for the peaceful sound of their quiet breaths

for the joy and the laughter that we share

for health and for safety

for the hope of what tomorrow (and the tomorrows after that) will bring

for a glorious, gracious Lord

we are blessed

{sigh}

2011-02-06T23:57:00.001-06:00

it was the best of times. it was the worst of times.

all the years with these two were certainly fun.

and, being off with leighton the first week of february 2011 was also fun (pics to come).

but, the first week of february is also a hard week in our family.

groundhog day would have been his 95th birthday.

grandpa gave the biggest and best hugs.

an unexpected death, one year later.

mema had the most humble spirit.

oh, maybe this week was more poignant for me than most because i wish everyday that leighton could have known her great grandparents. could have sat on their laps. could have played with their hair. could have heard their wise and witty stories. could have known their lives and their love firsthand.

they blessed my life immensely.

imitation is the greatest form of flattery

2011-01-21T02:15:00.006-06:00

i would like to reference you to the current edition of the pottery barn kids catalog, page 111 to be exact. note the tree arching over the bed. note the petite chandelier. i often wonder how the people at pottery barn dream up such beautiful settings (besides the fact that they don't have other jobs to consume their time or any real life limitations) but in this case, i feel certain they have been snooping...

and, now, may i remind you of a picture of leighton's nursery from fall 2009?

i can't really take credit for the tree because i found a picture of someone else's wall on google images and passed the grainy little jpg on to the true talent behind the whole thing, amy mcadams (http://amysdoodledandies.weebly.com/). and, i can't really take credit for the chandelier because that was russ.

i get up late and wear scrubs everyday so it's not often that i get to feel like a trendsetter!

so, you're welcome pottery barn. i personally still like ours better because i'm crazy about the flowers stuck on the wall. maybe they'll get that fixed before the summer edition.

this is just one of my FAVORITE family pictures with the tree-in-question in the background; it's from the day we brought leighton home from the hospital!

imitation is the greatest form of flattery

birthday babies

2011-01-19T23:24:00.001-06:00

what dear, sweet family & friends we are blessed by...

leighton's 1st birthday party

2011-01-13T05:24:00.118-06:00

A CUPCAKE CELEBRATION

oh, sweet leighton! this was the perfect party preceded by the perfect storm!

i was working nights the month leading up to leighton's birthday and i got sick the day before it so i was (of course) a little behind...but (as always) honey & hobby & russ swooped in and helped pull everything together.

i will never forgive jenna for introducing me to bakerella because that caused cravings and unrealistic expectations about what delectable pieces of art cupcake pops could be :) ok, in the end they turned out cute - and delicious - so i forgive jenna even if my pants don't.

i will never forgive my breakerbox for being such a finicky, crotchety little electrical nightmare. mom and i realized at midnight the night before the party that my freezers had both died....and that there was all sorts of bloody beef juice dripping on our premade cupcake pops. yum. let's start over.

i will never forgive harvey at meringue bakery for FORGETTING to make leighton's 1st birthday cake. i was deceived by the beautiful cakes on his website into believing that leighton's cake (which was supposed to look like stacked presents) would be equally delightful. and, i was naive in believing that our 4 emails and 2 phone conversations would be enough to ensure a finished product. i had a small out-of-body experience on the guy. it was unfortunate for him what years of living with a contractor and being in the bowels of the hospital can teach you to say. i unleashed all of my tired, sick frustration on the dude; thankfully, leighton was in the car. he argued...then he played dumb...then he almost cried with relief when mom rushed in and pulled me out. it makes my blood boil just thinking about it. luckily, breadwinners has really yummy cakes (premade) if you ever get in a pinch. and, luckily, i didn't get put in jail for beating a cakemaker's jolly little ass...oops, we dont' say that anymore.

so, anyways, these are all pics of the pregame. pics of the real party with all of the precious little babies

to come :)

on the day that leighton was born...

2011-01-10T08:33:00.002-06:00

i cried and i laughed and my heart overflowed with joy.

a few days later, we brought her home to a flock of pink flamingos and the warmth of dear, sweet friends.

a year later, the hogan crew was again leading the celebration, and we celebrated leighton's actual birthday with yummy cupcakes. she was a fan. honey and hobby came to celebrate, too!

party pics to come :)

a giraffe's weekend

2011-01-01T01:20:00.000-06:00

happy 2011!

pictures from new year's to come (perhaps much later) because i'm determined to go back and catch up, in order, on all the fun things that have happened in the last few months. consider it a resolution--along with (re)giving up caffeine and running and cooking--yikes. so, i'm setting down my champagne to revisit halloween 2010. somehow the pictures posted in reverse order (it should be some IT nerd's resolution to fix the gliches in blogger!) so we'll relive it in that direction.

leighton spent the vast majority of the halloween weekend dressed as a giraffe--trick or treating with the hogans, at the arboretum petting zoo with honey and hobby, and at william's 3rd birthday party. she made for a squeezably soft, precious little animal.

my african giraffe was in love with these little domestic farm animals...

lei & jenna (back when she was still jenna paxton)

thankful

2010-11-25T00:40:00.001-06:00

Festive Family Fall Greeting

Unique party invitations and announcements by Shutterfly.

View the entire collection of cards.

happy 1st birthday, leighton!

2010-11-17T23:46:00.001-06:00

sharkbait, we love you more than you will ever know.

xoxo

2010-11-03T09:38:00.003-05:00

no better way to spend a cold, rainy post-call morning than finding nemo with this little girl...

iPhone self-portrait

2010-11-02T04:15:00.003-05:00

happy halloween!

2010-10-31T22:53:00.003-05:00

love this little pumpkin!

happy birthday, booty!

2010-10-25T21:32:00.006-05:00

we celebrated russell's 31st with a birthday brunch amongst sweet family & friends.

aunt jennifer & will, jenna & killer, uncle ryan & leighton, the birthday boy and his adoring wife, mandy & thomas, pop & gigi

lei and the lindsey boys

russ and the houser boys

gigi with will and leighton

will testing the cake

stephanie & henry

love you, russ...more than you know.

sweet little sleepyhead

2010-10-21T09:27:00.002-05:00

al-boo-quirky

2010-10-04T22:41:00.025-05:00

everyone loves balloons.

and everyone loves the land of enchantment.

and we love the albuquerque international balloon fiesta.

i went several times growing up, russell and i went while we were engaged, and we couldn't wait to get leighton in on the action.

the only drawback is that it starts very early

...and sometimes its cold and you get a red nose...

but that's why you get to snuggle with hobby

...and snuggle (in style) with your baby...

my girlfriend LOVES to clap

leighton happily buckled in with safety moose and pink bear

and, just to finish off the weekend, i stole this picture from my old room in abilene, and i've been smiling at it in my bathroom ever since.

russell lindsey & sara stevens - balloon fiesta fall 2002

love my sweet little family more than they will ever know

nueve meses

2010-09-18T22:59:00.017-05:00

[in celebration of leighton's 10 month birthday, i'm posting her 9 month pictures. we'll blame the delay this time on physics boards.]

we ADORE this little girl.

leighton has the sweetest mix of cuddle and sass, and she is growing up way too fast.

pictures at the arboretum. russell was out-of-town, but he was excited about a reprieve from the quarterly photoshoots :)

welcome to the world

2010-08-15T22:30:00.004-05:00

two of my oldest, dearest friends in the whole wide world--leila and ruthie--are having babies tomorrow.

i'm sooooo excited.

these are children that we've prayed for and been anxious to meet for much longer than 9 months. we can't wait to welcome these two little miracles. hope their momma's are having sweet dreams and sleeping soundly tonight! and, praying for speedy, safe labors tomorrow.

can't wait to hold...

Leila & Jason's

little miss _____ _____ darby

(so anxious to hear her name!)

leila and cynthia grace

cg will clearly be a great big sister...

she was basically ready to babysit leighton back at christmastime

and....

Ruthie & Shane's

little mister jack ryan davis

mrs. davis, ruthie, jenna, mandy, me, leighton & mrs. kinkeade at a shower for jack

jenna (who better not be having a baby tomorrow) & leighton at baby jack's party

happy birthday baby sister & baby jack (....almost)! we love you!

come fly with me

2010-08-07T23:21:00.002-05:00

"The air up there in the clouds is very pure and fine, bracing and delicious. And why shouldn't it be? - It is the same the angels breathe."

~Mark Twain, "Roughing It"

This little girl is her daddy made over.

buenohead

2010-07-17T00:42:00.004-05:00

my little girlfriend is not afraid to eat. clearly.

it warms my heart that her abilene heritage is coming through and that she is already a die hard fan of the best tex mex in the whole wide world.

there was a split second of hesitation...

...but i think it's safe to say that she's a fan.

bueno job, leighton!

a joyful six months

2010-07-01T22:30:00.020-05:00

leighton at 6 months

i think she's pretty cute.

whatever. i think she's the most adorable baby ever.

and, i think she's a rockstar in a tutu.

i am so in love.

jennifer smith (www.unearthedphotography.com) pictures

treasured, as always

PGY 3

2010-07-01T06:57:00.014-05:00

you might want to eat an apple today. or maybe two. or ten.

because today is july 1st

it would have been ok to get sick in june, but you don't want to get sick in july.

july 1st is the day that everyone in medicine moves up a level on the totem pole and the new interns start manning the front lines. so, you could potentially wait in an ER today longer than your MD has actually been working as a doctor. the old joke (and the scary truth) about learning how to do procedures is--SEE ONE, DO ONE, TEACH ONE. i'm sure this is all very comforting to you.

so, as of today, i'm a PGY 3 (post graduate year 3).

and as much as i would have liked to wake up and realize it was saturday, after seeing all of the terrified, lost newbies wandering around the hospital, i'm just thankful for my settled and predictable life. i poignantly remember three of the most terrifying and nerve wracking days of my whole life--like nauseous, hysterical, turn and run for the hills kind of scared--during my journey through medicine.

(1) august 2004 - my first day of gross anatomy

somehow the prospect of being forced into a room full of dead bodies became dreadfully unappealing

(2) july 1, 2008 - my first day as an intern

terrified of killing someone in the CCU

(3) june 5, 2010

my first night of radiology call alone in the ER

so, a glimpse back in time...

white coat ceremony my 1st year in med school

(note the sparkling eyes, thin cheeks, blonde hair)

med school graduation

(note the black bags under the eyes, a few extra lbs, gray hair)

a random, somewhat creepy call room snapshot from my intern year

(ponytail, scrubs, coffee)

excited to get home from working nights last week to hug my punkie!

6 months

2010-06-29T23:18:00.007-05:00

happy 1/2 birthday, leighton!

we celebrated lulu's 6 month birthday on the actual day--may 17th--but her momma is belated in getting the pictures posted.

the little girlfriend TRIPPED OUT over her balloon.

we celebrated with rice cereal and sprinkles...yum.

(it was actually supposed to be pink rice cereal but despite my chemistry background, i couldn't concoct anything remotely pink that didn't look dreadfully diarrhea inducing.)

the little senorita enjoyed being the center of attention (which is really everyday life for her and nothing unique to the birthday)

we squeezed her extra hard.

leighton is more fun by the day, but it's scary how quickly the months have passed.

we are so thankful and amazed at the joy and the love that lei has brought to our family.

and, as a gift...

we got this precious little sign for her room to start teaching her about

something we can't buy her, can't give her, can't force upon her.

something we try to show her.

something we pray for her daily.

on your first (1/2) birthday, leighton, we wish you FAITH!

xoxo

2010-06-24T05:43:00.001-05:00

just a picture that i love

(leighton was 2 months old)

uh oh....

2010-06-21T10:17:00.004-05:00

can you see the video below with leighton crawling?

i can on my laptop, but there have been issues on other computers.

it's vital that i know if it's working...

because i'm sure you've never seen a baby crawl before

and because i just figured out how to download my videos and want to add more!

please let me know :)

daddy's day

2010-06-20T23:33:00.000-05:00

russell, you are a WONDERFUL dad.

leighton and i are blessed beyond measure.

watching russ with leighton has made me love him even more. they have a fairytale relationship; he is absolutely smitten with her, and she lights up and giggles just hearing his voice across the house. she brings out the silly, gentle, sweet side of russell no matter how crazy his day has been. they dance together; they play together. and, many nights, she drifts off into sweet dreams snuggled in her daddy's arms.

i hope she always appreciates the hard work and the sacrifice that her daddy makes to take care of us. i hope she gets his optimism and his faith. i hope she will revere him as much as we do our own fathers.

leight started saying 'dada' earlier this week, too, which was beautiful timing!

hobby and pop, we love you more than ever.

OH MY GOSH!!

2010-06-16T19:30:00.006-05:00

go girl...

we've seen a few modified bear crawls today with one knee down and one foot down...which makes it look like there's a little hitch in her giddy 'up (a broke wing chicken as her daddy says) but regardless, leighton's on the move!

we are so proud of our baby girl!

happy 7 month birthday (tomorrow), lele!

henry

2010-06-16T16:00:00.001-05:00

welcome to the world, baby henry!

stephanie (cox) & andrew van kirk had their baby boy last week, and he is nothing short of ADORABLE! we have been anxiously awaiting this little man's arrival for quite some time now. the coxes are our all-time best family friends; leighton and henry are almost exactly the same distance apart in age as henry's uncle beau and i. hope they'll keep the gummy bear sacrifice and other sacred traditions alive!

we love you, sweet boy!

poor baby

2010-06-15T10:18:00.004-05:00

punkie has an ear infection. (actually, she has 2.)

i don't think the doctor believed she was sick when she walked in and saw this face.

Sip & See - Abilene

2010-06-14T23:54:00.004-05:00

"It is as grandmothers that our mothers come into the fullness of their grace." - Christopher Morley

[these pictures are late...like, over half of leighton's life late. she's not really still this small so don't worry that i'm forgetting to feed her. it's just that i've been working, and rolling around on the floor trying to get a little somebody to crawl, and trying to get baby food off my ceiling, and training for a marathon...ok, ok...the last one's not true. but, the pictures remind me of too special of a day not to post.]

of all the things i want leighton to learn, i want her to know the love of sweet family & friends. and of all the things i've ever wanted to show off, lele is my pride & joy.

honey hosted a sip & see at her house in abilene.

it was ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.

the princess got worn out by all the excitement

thank you, honey, for being such a doting, devoted, detailed grandmother--for the sip & see and always. we love you.

sweet dreams

2010-06-13T23:56:00.007-05:00

i always sneak in to give leighton a final kiss goodnight before i crawl in bed, but there are nights when i just have to hold her. tonight was one of those nights.

because i've been working nights and i've missed putting her to bed

because life in general is too busy and too fleeting

because someday she'll be too big to rock

because i can sleep when she's old

because there's a peace in her gentle, quiet breaths

because i'm thankful for her health

because i love seeing her in footy pajamas

because it warms my heart to feel those tiny hands wrap around my neck

because she'll be bigger by morning

because i want to whisper 1000 times how much i love her

because my heart is so content

grateful. joyful. blessed.

look at this...

2010-05-29T00:33:00.006-05:00

i have 2 pearly white T-rex teeth...

the better to bite you with, my dear.

i have crazy out-of-control drool, but grace doesn't seem to mind.

and, i am A-L-M-O-S-T crawling. right now it's a booty shake, a slight shuffle backwards, a belly flop and a squeal of frustration OR continual rocking and a serious face of fear/uncertainty.

watch out world

3 month pictures

2010-05-11T17:31:00.008-05:00

i have been pleading with leighton to stay little forever. despite all the readings of peter pan, her 6 month birthday is next week. how is that even possible? so, i felt the fire to get her 3 month pictures posted. (www.unearthedphotography.com, jennifer smith...amazing, as always)

we are smitten with our sweet baby girl...

mother's day

2010-05-10T22:53:00.002-05:00

love.these.two.more.than.life.

blessings & grace

2010-04-22T23:07:00.000-05:00

i now appreciate what blessings and grace a baby can bestow. i know that leighton won't be spared from the greed, the hurt, the pride, the selfishness, the vanity and the depravity of this world . . . but for now, she is innocence and purity and perfection, and i see Christ more clearly through her.

it just doesn't get any sweeter than this...

2010-04-17T14:38:00.011-05:00

bright sunshine

fresh springtime grass

a west texas breeze

a playground

the girls i love most

perfection

as a last minute outing while we were visiting abilene a few weeks ago, we decided to stop at a playground to blow bubbles with leighton. we ended up at austin, which is where both my mom & i went to elementary school. there is still something overly sentimental that makes me smile to think of my mom as a little girl & myself as a little girl & my own little girl playing in the same place.

my parents gave me a zoom lens for my camera for my 28th birthday and so we had it on hand to catch leighton's reactions. she was nonplussed about bubbles, delighted by grass, unsure about the slide and joyful to be held and tickled in the afternoon shade. mom kept snapping pictures while we were playing, and somehow the images she caught absolutely captured the magic of that afternoon.

i LOVE these pictures. they remind me to be GRATEFUL for all of life's MIRACLES--big and small.

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is." --Albert Einstein

HE IS RISEN

2010-04-13T23:37:00.002-05:00

Leighton's 1st Easter

The Easter Bunny found us!

A sweet smocked bunny dress that Honey made--too precious.

Russ & Leighton before church.

Just one of my favorites from the day...

Playing with Daddy...she giggles everytime he does this :)

GLAD

how is lele possibly big enough to (pseudo) sit up by herself? there's a part of me that gets giddy & excited, and there's a part of me that wants to push her over & keep her small.

MAD

we're still working on patience, to which end she has no genetic advantage. (and, no, she didn't make this face because i tried to push her over. promise.)

happy birthday, honey!

2010-04-11T23:16:00.002-05:00

we love you.

the baby who ate easter

2010-04-04T23:09:00.004-05:00

happy easter!

more sweet pics to come, but these made me smile...

we are so in love with our own drooly, toothless little bunny!

Sic 'Em!

2010-03-28T14:08:00.002-05:00

To: Ella

2010-03-23T23:07:00.004-05:00

every princess needs a prince charming . . . and a mustache.

everybody knows that.

this is a picture that tiffany (leighton's nanny) took & sent to me at the hospital. it made me laugh out loud.

and, this is a picture of russell trying to impart his (limited) knowledge of disney fairytales to ella some time ago...by putting a 'stache on all of the characters.

and, yes, they all lived happily ever after.

happy st. patrick's day!

2010-03-17T20:00:00.000-05:00

and happy 4 month birthday to this little irish dumpling!

i never thought

2010-03-07T22:31:00.014-06:00

there were a lot of things i expected walking into motherhood, but i never thought...

that such a tiny little thing could make my world so complete.

that i would really be able to recognize leighton's cry amongst all others. or that i would hear the nuances of i'm hungry, i'm wet, i'm tired, i'm upset & i'm just plain mad.

that i would drive like my grandma when i have her in the car.

that poop could really get all the way up a baby's back (and sometimes in her armpits) in 2 milliseconds. and that sometimes i wouldn't realize there was poop on me until i saw it later in a picture.

that i would ever hurt so much leaving her each morning.

that i could learn to trust someone to keep her during the day.

that russ and i would sometimes gladly turn on the lights & play with leighton instead of sleeping when she was smiley at 5am.

that i would have the nursing equivalent of porn star boobs. and that i would unashamedly pump the aforementioned driving down i35.

that a hungry baby is a form of a small, rabid animal.

that baby fingernails grow 17 inches per day.

that baby boogers can be larger than the baby.

that i would subject everyone i work with (mostly men) to my delivery story over & over again.

that i would think it was hysterical instead of mortifying when she absolutely destroyed her diaper in church as the music stopped and the sanctuary fell silent.

that i could take 5,000 pictures in less then 4 months. that i would proudly show them to complete strangers.

that i could just stare at leighton for hours.

that i could get so lost in talking to leighton in her car seat that i would wreck our basket in target and knock over the whole display.

that i could survive on precious little sleep without even caring. and that the sound of her cry in the middle of the night would be like music compared to a pager.

that i would appreciate vibrating furniture so much.

that i would absolutely celebrate every milestone. and make everyone else watch and celebrate it, too.

that i would coo & sing & talk like a babbling idiot in public.

that things i used to be high stress about have been relegated to the back burner. and that the world is sweeter because of it.

that i would have nightmares about her health and her safety.

that simple snaps could be so darn confusing & exasperating in the dark.

that my finger foods would often taste like desitin (which means a little like booty, too). and that i wouldn't even care.

that seeing her nose bleed one drop made me more scared than any level one trauma i've ever taken care of. that a quasi-fever would make me more alert than i've ever been in the icu.

that i could love anyone so much.

that i could pray so fervently.

i am smitten with my baby girl.

sweetheart

2010-02-27T22:17:00.010-06:00

ps - i completely stole this idea from annalee. LOVE it!

the raising of a saint

2010-02-26T23:44:00.007-06:00

i guess we all aspire for our children to be precious little saints.

in our circle of friends, it's literal. as in, a new orleans saint.

WHODAT

we've been indoctrinated.

my love affair with nola began last spring.

i dream of cafe du monde, and i cannot wait to a let a little leighton lindsey blow powdered sugar off her beignet someday soon. leighton was actually along for the new orleans trip last year, but we didn't know it at the time. (thankfully, caroline was pregnant, too, which saved leighton from the hazards of too many....actually any...hurricanes.)

New Orleans - March 2009

somehow, too, our dearest friends all have some connection to the big easy.

reed & caroline are obsessed with nola, and they are saints fanatics.

mr. goldman became somewhat of a national icon in the dome during this football season.

lauren is from new orleans.

tiffany--leighton's nanny--is also from new orleans & an avid saints fan.

so, we started leighton early...she wore her fleur de lis proudly despite the glares of dallas' star laden cowboys fans.

and, by the super bowl, she was a true little saintsation!

i wanted to eat her alive in this tutu.

russ & reed went to the game in miami!

bless dem boys!

WHODAT!

milk monster

2010-02-19T23:13:00.005-06:00

this picture is so leighton.

we love her little sign language. for those of you who don't speak latin (that's...lay-tuhn), let me interpret.

this look does not mean, "i am getting hungry and would like some milk, please." not by a long shot.

no, this particular gesture means, "i am starving my diaper-wearing booty off and if i don't get some milk now, i'm going to freak out." milliseconds become important when you see this face. and, this is when it's advantageous to be me over someone who needs a bottle warmer.

love you, little milk monster!

my.love.

2010-02-13T22:23:00.002-06:00

mema

2010-02-03T20:28:00.005-06:00

mema, my dad's mom, died today.

we are beyond sad. horrifically shocked.

i am absolutely nauseous that leighton never got to meet her.

thinking about her has always helped keep me grounded;

she knew the important things in life but few of the luxuries.

kind. smart. humble. quiet. witty. loyal. generous.

we were blessed by her simple life & blessed by her strong love.

...AND NOW

2010-01-29T23:03:00.002-06:00

love, love, love this little dumplin'

THEN...

2010-01-28T00:23:00.008-06:00

baby leighton

13 days of life

jennifer smith (www.unearthedphotography.com) took these pictures for us. she's wonderful--the best kept secret in dfw!

christmas 2009

2010-01-09T22:55:00.007-06:00

grateful. joyful. blessed.

we started the holidays in waco...

aunt mary needlepoint a stocking for leighton. it's absolutely beautiful.

leyley watched christmas vacation for the first time; it's family tradition.

she got a white christmas!

we spent christmas eve at the hogans. the elves brought pj's for the girls, and cissy got all of us pajamas to snuggle in, too. it's a tradition that we're adopting!

we left out milk (leighton's favorite) & cookies (my favorite) for santa and carrots for the reindeer. funny...santa was apparently much hungrier than rudolph given the remains on christmas morning...

santa baby!

christmas morning!

christmas night

thanksgiving 2009

2010-01-06T23:05:00.004-06:00

thanksgiving has passed, but our hearts remain abundantly grateful.

for leighton

for family who are dear friends

for dear friends who are family

for salvation

sweet dreams

2010-01-03T18:36:00.001-06:00

i could pass every hour of the next 1000 years just watching leighton sleep. and, that's what i've been doing for the last 6 1/2 weeks--not reading, not writing thank yous, not folding clothes--just staring at leighton and marveling at the miracle of it all.

innocence. tranquility. random, sweet smiles while she's talking with the angels and chatting with the fairies. i love every gentle breath and quiet whimper.

sweet dreams, baby girl.

we believe

2009-12-25T00:00:00.003-06:00

"For unto us a child is born . . ." Isaiah 9:6

merry christmas!

smile

2009-12-20T23:20:00.004-06:00

just because these make me smile...

what happened to my little paperclip baby? she seems so long now!

tuesday's child is full of grace

2009-12-17T23:46:00.006-06:00

happy 1 month birthday, lele!

tuesday's child...

we love you so much that it hurts.

before we saw her sweet face...

2009-12-13T23:09:00.011-06:00

i know, i know...these are anti-climactic since the most beautiful child in the world is here (and we all really want pictures of her), but i have to post these maternity photos to brag on jennifer smith of UNEARTHED PHOTOGRAPHY. for my abilene friends, this is jerimiah smith's adorable wife. she is absolutely precious--a sweet, fun, creative beauty! if you're in the dallas/ft. worth area, her talent is an absolute steal (check the website). russ and i had so much fun cuddling at the dallas arboretum and daydreaming about our baby girl. jennifer has taken pictures of leighton, too; we haven't seen all of those newborn photos, but i'll post them soon.

i knew i would love the baby behind that bump, but i never imagined how much. we are absolutely smitten.

life with leighton

2009-11-25T10:00:00.012-06:00

leighton's story in pictures...

a forewarning and disclaimer: this post is obnoxiously long with nauseating details. i know that. but, i am absolutely obsessed with this baby. i spend every moment staring at her, smelling her sweet skin, talking to her, loving on her and praying for her. she is the most perfect child i have ever seen, and i want to savor and to remember every moment.

pre-game

gigi & pop

honey & granddad

i felt enough labor contractions to check off that box.

surprise c-section for our breech baby...

the first time i got to meet leighton (which felt like an eternity after everyone else got to see her because of that drat blue drape)!

going to recovery

doula cissy! caroline was in the OR during leighton's delivery, and we are forever grateful for all of her sweet words of encouragement and the irreplaceable pictures that she took of that day! her enthusiasm helped take some of the nervous edge off the surgery.

all of the grandparents meeting leighton.

red baby after her 1st bath

proseco to toast leighton in her cute little cups!

russell's "push present" to me (which he let me keep despite being cut)--BEAUTIFUL diamond earrings! russ is really too much--the most thoughful, generous, romantic husband ever.

going home!

our house got overtaken by a flock of pink flamingoes announcing leighton's birth by our dearest friends, the hogans! i laughed so hard when i saw it that i almost blew a stich.

lourdes...leighton's nanny-to-be!

the nursery that legiton came home to enjoy...

amy mcadams, a dear longtime friend, painted the tree on leighton's wall. we absolutely LOVE it! she worked this magic based off a ghetto, pixelated internet picture we had found. amazing. thanks, wamy!

a "love" heart that we had painted for her.

the guardian angel wings are my favorite accessory in the nursery! my mom found my 16th birthday card from my grandma in my old bedroom in abilene, and it still had money inside; after all these years, i used the money to buy these wings. how i wish grandma and leighton could have known each other! they would have been quite a devoted, sassy pair. i like to think of grandma as the guardian angel of her tiny little namesake. these two have certainly been angels in my life.

grace (our original dog-hter) meeting leighton & loving on her piggies!

molly meeting leighton...in more of a controlled, zoo exhibit type display

putting our darling to sleep on the first night at home

how the breech girlfriend sleeps!

thanks to honey (my mom) for getting all of these pictures posted for me! she has been a lifesaver for us since leighton was born--cooking, cleaning, running errands, babysitting to give me naps and generally loving on us all.

leighton's story in words...

it didn't exactly happen as i had planned (and, you know that i had it planned). i meant to have a calm realization that i was going into labor, to spend hours at home timing my contractions before we went to the hospital and to be very tough once we got there before caving for my epidural. i meant for my toes to be well manicured and for my nails to be painted. i meant to finish this month at work and to have an early december baby. and, i meant to push that little squirt out when the day came. not so much.

the story of leighton's birth really started the week before when i was walking through the grocery store buying stamps and, suddenly, realized that it looked like (emphasis on looked like) i had wet my pants. i called russ in a bit of a panic and went straight to the doctor to see if my water had broken. my doctor's partner determined that my water had NOT broken. ok, so was it leaking? probably not. ok, so what was that? i was sitting there thinking, "i know you have decided that i peed on myself, but i promise i didn't. i didn't, right? i mean, i didn't need to...or feel like i did..." whatever. a rather unsatisfying answer, but they scheduled me for a routine visit the following tuesday and sent me on my way. i returned to the reading room a little disappointed, a little relieved and a little awkward about how to explain my absence.

fast forward to monday, november 16th 2009. life as usual. russ and i both worked normal days. we spent the evening in front of a fire, [russ] sipping wine and eating homemade burgers. russ tapped my belly that night and told leighton that he was ready for her to come play with us. i scolded him for saying that because she was still a preemie (36 weeks 6 days, ~6pm), and we both laughed because she would technically be full term in only a matter of hours.

i was climbing in bed for the night about 10:30 and...gush. i told russell that i thought i had peed my pants (and this time might actually have bought that explanation). i showered, found new pajamas and was climbing back into bed and...gush. "you have got to be kidding me!" i was nervous about another false alarm, but russell convinced me that my water had really broken this time. i had leighton's and my bag packed, but poor russ was running around in a daze repeating, "i'm so unprepared! i should have packed earlier."

we drove to the hospital, trying to go fast just so we could throw that into the story, but we hit EVERY stop light between the house and Baylor, and what usually is a 5 minute car drive became 15. the 'you're about to be walking' version of our low gas light came on, and russell almost freaked out on me. but, we made it.

they checked me into an L&D room to determine if i needed to be admitted, and they started by asking 1000 questions, including "how do you learn best? 1-on-1. visual aides. etc." really?! you have got to be joking! my water may have just broken, and we may be having a baby tonight...and we're wasting time on a questionaire! finally someone checked and my water really had broken (3cm/90% effaced/-2). i wasn't hurting at first so russ and i roamed the baylor halls until my contractions were about 1 minute apart and enough to make me nauseous and sweaty at each peak. russ was afraid that i was going to pass out, so he banned me to my L&D room--and, i'll admit, i didn't argue.

my parents arrived from abilene about 2:10 AM, and by that time, i had progressed to 5 cm/fully effaced/high. all of anesthesia was tied up in emergency c-sections, so they gave me some IV medication to take the edge off my pain. it made me goo-oof-y. it was frustrating because i knew i was being weird but couldn't find the words to express the swirling sensation in my mind; i told everyone that it felt like "swimming in the ocean" and "like i've had 20 beers." russell's parents joined the action about 3:00 AM, and shortly thereafter, anesthesia arrived with their magic back needle. the waiting game continued until 5:15 AM.

through the last trimester, we noticed a very stubborn baby body part that would wedge itself up under my ribs, particulary if leighton got startled or if i started slouching at work. they had us convinced that it was her booty. yes, she could have inherited a rockhard tail section from me...ok, from her daddy...but a really hard, stubborn little head was her genetic fate and was always my concern. so, when they finally came to recheck me, i told joy (my friend from med school who was the resident on call) that there was still some piece of baby very high and very hard. i had made it to 6 cm/fully effaced/STILL high. joy looked with a sono and within seconds, we could both see that leighton was breech.

i knew immediately that we were now talking c-section, and i was disappointed. since i was dilated, they wanted to proceed fairly quickly to the OR so that she wouldn't drop down and complicate the surgery. anesthesia came to tweak my epidural--to make the tingly legs that i could move feel like complete logs. russell suited up in scrubs and caroline made it to take pictures, and then they rolled me back. it was so strange to be on that side of the blue drape--to know what the surgery would have looked like but to only be able to hear them asking for instruments from the scrub nurse, to be completely awake and know they were cutting. russell was fantastic; he was all i could see, and i won't ever forget the pensive look on his face.

i heard the surgeon say, "she's out," but there was no immediate cry. i was imploringly telling russell, "she needs to cry! she needs to cry!" leighton finally whimpered a pathetic little kitten noise--and then she got going. thank you Jesus. it felt like an eternity trapped behind that blue drape--not being able to see her, relying on russell to relay that she was breathing well and that she was pink and that she was beautiful. the pictures of those moments are priceless to me since i missed them in realtime.

finally, russ brought her over to me. he has since said, "when i saw her and i saw you, the whole world stopped." i can't be any more poetic about it than that.

leighton has been perfect. she is completely chill, and i have to wake her up at night. i can't spend enough time rocking her and absorbing every detail. it's still just surreal that she is ours.

we are so grateful for her health and her safety. we are joyfully smitten. we are overwhelmingly in love. we are blessed.

"For this child, I have prayed; and the Lord hath given me my petition which I asked of Him"

I Samuel 1:27

Leighton Floryn Lindsey

2009-11-19T11:26:00.009-06:00

leighton made an unexpected arrival tuesday, november 17th at 6:12 am!

6 lbs 1 oz -- 18 1/2 inches

full story & pics will follow once we get home from the hospital.

the c-section was a surprise for everyone...

first picture as a family of three.

leighton's proud daddy.

our little love-sponge.

we are absolutely overwhelmed by our love for this tiny little girl--assured of God's grace, astounded by His perfection and amazed by her purity. our lives are already immeasurably richer because of leighton, and we are in complete adoration.